|Just a couple of snuggle bugs|
|Linc climbing in Warner's bed|
I’ve had great dreams of bring a “yes” mom. A fun mom. A get on the floor and play Legos with me for hours mom. I imagine my kids always getting along and being happy and never complaining about what is for dinner.
Unfortunately, that isn’t my reality. I have become a “no” mom. I say no more than any other word daily. No, don’t climb on top of the refrigerator. No, don’t draw on your face with Sharpie. No, you cannot have pizza for dinner… again. Some of my no’s come from looking out for my children. I am responsible for keeping my kids safe and out of harms way and sometimes saying no is ok and has to happen.
I also say no when I don’t feel like I have the energy or desire to do something. No, I don’t want to let you paint and then have to spend more time setting and cleaning up than you are actually painting. No, you cannot ride your bike with your friends for just five more minutes, it’s almost dinner time. No, Mommy doesn’t want to play swing me around… again. Other times saying no makes me miss special moments with my boys. They are growing faster than I ever thought possible and by saying no to everything could cause me to miss out on some of the most important mini moments in their lives.
I have been trying to work on saying yes more often these days. I don’t automatically say no when asked to read another chapter or if I want help with dinner. I still have my to do list to take care of, but I also have a relationship with my boys to nurture so we invented the “Sixty Second Snuggle.” My middle boy always wants me to lay down with him while he tries to fall asleep. I always just want him to fall asleep so I can go work on something else. As a sort of compromise I will cuddle with him in bed for a full minute giving him my full and complete undivided attention. We can talk or just lay there but it gives him the reassurance that I will always be there for him, but there is a short time limit that he knows is coming
There are many more ways I can plunge into saying yes more often and I know I can make it happen. Saying yes has actually given me more time and allowed me to be happier with myself and my boys.